The Fat Diaries: Beware the Vending Machine Diet

Asking restaurants and theaters to post calorie counts seems like a good call, but targeting vending machines may be too much.

New rules are being proposed by the FDA that could (if approved) make some changes in the world of vending machines. The feds want the calorie content of each item sold to be prominently displayed next to or on the machines themselves, much like restaurants have been required to do on menus.  Now I said “yippy” when they did this in restaurants, and I even did a victory dance when they required movie theatres to do this, but as far as vending machines go, I’m not so sure.

In its favor, I like the new caloric display rules. I like going into a restaurant and knowing the calorie content of my meal. I like knowing that I weigh my options more carefully and that I have to stop and ask myself: am I really hungry enough for a 500 calorie sandwich or will the 230 calorie soup be enough? If they post calorie information on vending machines, people are more empowered to make healthy choices (even if that choice is to skip the machine and bring a sandwich from home).

But on the other hand this seems a little redundant and the logistics of it seem like a nightmare. Even the FDA admitted it was stumped and couldn’t provide many feasible solutions as to how this should be done.

For one thing, the calorie content of snacks is ALREADY printed on all the packaging. In revolving machines, one can usually spot the labels on sandwiches and some chips. In spiral machines, you can’t see them though. This problem could be solved by simply flipping the packaging around, but then you’d lose the product name. Some companies are beginning to package their products with calorie content on the front of the bags. If they start doing so on the front of their single-size packages that would solve this problem.

Some proposals suggested that signs or posters displaying a comprehensive list of the contents and the calorie count be hung next to the machines.  The problem with this is that the content of vending machines is in constant flux. When one product doesn’t move it’s switched out for another. This would require the nutrition signs to be (a) cheap and easily replaceable ; (b) in a medium where content can be easily updated, for example a digital sign – though this of course would need to be durable and tamper-resistant, or (c) display every conceivable item that could ever be sold in the vending machine.

One idea I came up with in my mad imagination with is to have a “general calorie count” sign where approximate calorie counts are given by types of items. Chips: 200-250 calories. Or chocolate bars: 130-200 calories. It wouldn’t be foolproof, but combined with the nutritional information on the packets, one could make some general estimates.

A way to accommodate schools where there are vending machines (and there are already proposals in this vein) would be to limit the types of food that go in machines in the first place. Many schools are already restricting machine selections to snack foods that are low calorie and healthy.  But as for office buildings, there’s nothing that can really restrict vending machine contents. That’s for the office-dwellers to work on. And some have gotten proactive and done this.

They start petitions! They leave post-it notes on windows and hold meetings about vending machine snacks! We’re not powerless drones in this situation; we CAN affect change when it comes to vending machine content without relying on the government to make mandates for us. So until the FDA comes up with a solution, let’s come up with our own.

My solution? I skip the vending machine entirely. I’ve known the pitfalls of living on vending machine food in high school and college and it brought me nothing but heart ache, acne and rotten teeth.  It’s just one of those things I had to swear off of when I decided to drastically change my eating habits. It’s also the one thing I miss the least. There’s nothing that bugs me more than paying a buck-fifty for a bag of chips I could make for twenty cents. I bring my own snacks and lunches to the pool, gym, and work (when I do work in a building) and I use my own selection of healthier food from home. If it’s just a passing 3:00pm fancy when I really need a sugar rush, I ignore it and look for a water fountain instead.

Having absolutely no quarters on my person helps this resolution a great deal, but it kind of sucks when we have to take the toll road.

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