Palin Gets Her Buzzsaw
On the latest Sarah Palin's Alaska: Sarah grabs a chainsaw and heads to a logging camp.
Preview for next week:
Next week, Sarah Palin's Alaska gets a two-hour finale.
And Piper attempts to sell gold on eBay.
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Update at 10:00pm:
Willow IS faster than her dad! She made the final lap in 20 seconds!
Willow's take on crashing the stock car? "I swear, I'm a good driver."
The increased speed comes with a lack of control, but life is all about trade-offs.
To cap off the episode, Palin, Todd and Willow go out with a guide to go bear watching. As they head out, Palin asks her guide what he is carrying to protect the group. He says he has bear-spray.
From the way Palin sarcastically comments about this, she clearly would feel safer if the guide was carrying a shot-gun.
But you know, bears are cool to look at. She even managed to make a bunch of contrived Mama Grizzly references!
Though Willow has her priorities straight. When she gets back home, the first question she asks is "Dad, can we go to the DMV now?"
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Update at 9:49pm:
Finally, we get to see Willow Palin partake in stock car racing!
We start off with Todd, after three laps, his record time around the track is 23 seconds! Can Willow beat him? In her neon pink stock car?
First lap time, 30.03 seconds! Not too far behind…
Second lap she makes 23 seconds! She can tie her dad…
But on the third lap, she goes off the track and hits one of the dirt walls. I think she'll make it out ok though.
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Update at 9:38pm:
Palin heads out to see if Willow has done any of her pre-assigned cooking. Amazingly she has been "hard" at work!
My father, who watching the show with me comments: "Sarah cut down a tree, Willow is cutting a cabbage."
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Update at 9:33pm:
Ok, so the big piece of equipment that moves the tree trunks is called a "Shovel Logger"
Palin of course has no idea how to use the shovel logger. We are told that learning to use it is like "learning to ride a bicycle." Like a giant bicycle with a huge claw.
If you were afriad there would be nothing political in this episode, don't worry, because Palin's resentment shows through in good form!
Palin complains about people writing her "nasty letters". These nasty letters are presumably from conservationists complaining about her support for the logging industry. (Really? normal people complain about this? Or just a couple of tree-hugging nuts?)
As Palin notes (paraphrased): "Where do they think the pencils they get to write those letters come from?!"
Serious case of resentment there. Its amazing how she takes every piece of criticism personally. Doesn't she know that this just encourages more of it?
Palin could learn something from the way Willow annoys her...
Oh, and Willow isn't doing any of the pre-assigned activities on the reality show. She might have been nightmare to direct.
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Update at 9:23pm:
Willow couldn't go out to cut the tree, so she gets to participate in the reforesting.
Sarah Palin: "Willow its going to be a blast, you can re-plant trees!" This (understandably) does not excite Willow.
Willow looks bored. As Sarah says, "Willow sometimes has selective hearing, she can't hear her mother."
Because Willow is bored out of her skull, Palin takes her to the beach to have a "talk". While Palin tries to dispense motherly advice, Willow spends her time trying to skip rocks out on the lake. When Palin tries to get Willow to listen, Willow is obstinate: "Mom, you're throwing me off!"
Forget Bristol, Willow is the problem children in the making.
(Read The Awl on "The Making of Willow Palin")
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Update at 9:16pm:
Palin on tree cutting, this is "Serious Business" and if it falls the wrong way (as in, onto the people) its bad news.
Now we get a little bit of an education on how they cut and prepare the wood for transport!
Also, somewhere in Alaska, is a chainsaw with Sarah Palin's signature on it.
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Update at 9:13pm:
It turns out that cutting down a giant tree with a chainsaw is not easy. I give Palin credit for stepping up to do it. There are chucks of wood flying everywhere.
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Update at 9:07pm:
Not even the Christmas weekend can stop Sarah Palin!
On tonight's episode, Willow will be taught what a "hard day's work" means. Willow will also get her driver's licensee.
Willow is sarcastic and snarky. As The Awl predicted weeks ago, Willow could potentially be the most entertaining character on the show. (Piper is also entertaining as well since she is The Voice of Reason.)
And while they are driving to the logging camp, Sarah Palin relates the store of the infamous "Refudiate" tweet! It turns out it was… a typo! Because her finger slipped! This is captivating behind the scenes info!
Palin's telling of the origin of the term is less dramatic than Bill Kristol's.
And Willow is already looking bored, and constantly looking for service for her iPhone.
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She's a Lumberjack and she's ok! She sleeps all night and she works all day!
Tonight's post-Christmas episode of Sarah Palin's Alaska has Palin cutting down giant trees with a chainsaw. She will also get to lift up giant tree trunks with some very heavy pieces of equipment, though handling the chainsaw seems more life threatening.
As we noted in last week's liveblog, we will also be on the lookout for Willow Palin's new "friend" Andy. If he ends up making a protracted appearance in this episode, how many passive aggressive comments about Levi will Palin be able to make?