The Fat Diaries: Escaping the Summer Heat
As I may have already stated, I’m not a huge fan of summer. Even as a kid I was one of those inert lumps on my mother’s couch, hiding inside with the AC cranked and complaining that Nickelodeon only played one hour of Inspector Gadget a day. My mother kept trying to shoo me outdoors to play, but in 93º sun and humidity I didn’t want to do much more than barf. Why was summer vacation never during a more temperate season, when I’d want to be outside? Why didn’t we get our 2 months off during September, which was hot but not boiling, and in brisk cool October?
As I’m currently hiding from a code-red heat wave in my darkened living room, I find myself wondering the same thing today. Why are we sending our kids to camp and football practice when it’s hot enough to cause fainting spells and brain damage? For the rest of the kids, they’re stuck inside doing sedentary activity instead of running around and getting some exercise. And when it’s finally cool enough to engage in walks, and jogs and sports, we bundle them back into school where they’re chained to their desks for hours.
Wouldn’t it make more sense to have school indoors when it’s too hot to go outside, and then have a break when the weather’s tolerable again? I realize this 2010 summer is a record-breaking heat wave and that summer isn’t usually this miserable. I’ve personally found it miserable because I’m one of those malcontents who want the temperature outdoors to constantly be between 60º and 75º (with snow only on Thanksgiving and Christmas). I’ve recently developed a taste for nature, however, and my forced seclusion indoors has been driving me nuts. Wednesday, as the mercury is climbed to 102º, I had to patiently explain to my 3-year-old daughter that it’s too hot to even blow bubbles on the front stoop.
So my summer-vacation to fall-vacation idea sounds like a good plan to me. I’m not going to do anything more about it than sit in my minivan at school pick-up time –some fall afternoon when the air is deliciously crisp and smells of apples – and know deep in my heart that it’s a good idea. There is one VERY clear flaw in this plan, however, and it’s not the overlap with football season. The problem is that a lot of public schools have ancient or even nonexistent air-conditioning capabilities. Most school busses have no AC at all. You can draw what conjectures you will from that – budget cuts, mismanagement, strong-arming, the recession – the reasons vary from district to district. Simply put, however, if we required our schools to remain open in the summer and closed in the fall, they would request a LOT more money and our kids would be leverage for one side or the other until it was resolved. Best not to attempt it really.
So as I watch my kids playing on the internet on this scorching day, and learning to spell “Wubbulous” and “Whoville,” I’m a little sad that in two months my plans to go to the park will have the right weather, but no time. I’ll have to put on that “Qi Gong” video and participate with them, or put on some music and try to teach the kids to salsa dance.
Of course I have to get them to pick up their toys first (ugh). I’m glad that my kids’ two-month holiday coincides with beach-season at least. The beach really is better in July than October, even if there are less jellyfish in fall.
