Sarko's Short Man Complex Reaches New Heights

Sarko’s legendary insecurities over his 5’5” frame reached new heights this week when he requested that taller bodyguards not apply for his security detail.

Sarko’s legendary insecurities over his 5’5” frame reached new heights this past Sunday when he requested that a taller, “beefier” bodyguard not apply for the position.

The French blogosphere is abuzz with stories about the President’s uniquely designed, height-enhancing shoes, his tendency to stand on tiptoe while posing for pictures, and – of course – his 5’9”, ex-supermodel wife, Carla Bruni.

A French news site notes that while speaking to an audience of factory workers in September, “Sarkozy was ‘the tallest’ in the crowd because the people around him had been chosen from among the factory’s shortest employees.”

The French President’s approval ratings have recently dipped to below 30 percent.

No one likes an egoistic, insecure, petty person.  And people especially don’t like leaders who routinely exhibit some – and in Sarko’s case, all – of these qualities.

Though few things could salvage Sarkozy’s woeful approval ratings, standing confidently next to his towering, Louboutin-wearing wife would probably only help him; “there’s a man that’s comfortable in his own skin!” we would think to ourselves, rather than “there’s a man so insecure he forces his ex-supermodel wife to wear flats.”

As a 5’9” woman myself, I would just like to request that all of you less than “statuesque” men out there let go of the anxiety over your height and let us wear heels. We'll think you're the bigger man for it.