Help! I'm Pregnant and a Co-Worker Called Me Fat

Eddie hears from a reader who's co-worker made a crack about her pregnancy-related weight gain. Does she have a free pass to make a nasty joke of her own?

Writing in the Globe and Mail, David Eddie hears from a reader offended by a co-worker's comment. The reader writes:

I'm six months pregnant and a junior lawyer in a small law office. The office is amazing, but there’s one déclassé assistant who always has something nasty to say. Yesterday, I had trouble fitting into my court robes, which provided some amusement for the office – myself included. Today, someone brought in doughnuts, and this individual said, loudly: “We need to keep her away from the doughnuts because she’s too fat to fit into her robes.” I was so shocked that I didn’t say anything. I’ve been seething ever since, and I know the issue is going to arise again because a) I’ve got three months to go and b) I saw how rude she was to another pregnant lawyer at work. ...

Should she say something to her co-worker?  Maybe even toss a mean joke back?  Eddie's advice:

Suppose it happens again. Suppose she says something like “I hope they make Spanx for pregnant women: You’re gonna need ’em to get into your robes soon.”

And suppose you counter-zing her – something like, “What would you know about it? A man has to want to have sex with you for you to get pregnant.”

(And here I picture you “low-fiving” your colleagues, standing around in your robes going, “Oh, snap” and “Did she go there?” “The prima facie evidence indicates she did.”)

She sounds like just the type to come up with a counter-counter-zinger even more witless, if possible, than calling a pregnant woman “fat.” (“Oh, yeah? Your hair’s frizzy. What, did you lose your conditioner?”)

And then the friction in your office would be rising, and you’d be sinking – to her level. A level which you should remain above, madam. ...

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