Gurdon Asks: Why Would Anyone Snort Vodka?

In her column for the Washington Examiner, Meghan Cox Gurdon asks why some people practice very self-destructive antics:

There was a fraternity brother a few years ahead of me in college who earned a certain amount of notoriety for snorting vodka at a party. To the gleeful horror of all, he bent his head over a shot glass and actually aspirated the stuff.

"Gross!" everyone was said to have yelled.

"Yaughtfph!" the fellow was said to have spluttered, gasping and gagging. Thus the legend was born, and it lasted long after he had graduated. But no one was tempted to follow where the daring student from Alaska had gone. What he did was funny, but everyone knew it was depraved. Why snort vodka, anyway, when a person could just drink it?

Fast-forward to the present, and, thanks to the special genius of mankind, the young once again show that they will insist on outstripping those who came before them.

Now we have frat boys giving themselves painfully intoxicating vodka eyewashes (see Examiner, Washington, May 25). Apparently, some co-eds are even drenching feminine sanitary items with spirits so as to get a buzz without calories. From the private parts straight to the bloodstream with no intervening moment of civilization! The mind reels.